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Don't come near me

I have that thing that’s going around. I know it’s going around because everyone I speak to knows someone who has it or has had it.

“Sore throat?” they ask.

“Yes.”

“Coughing?”

“Yes.”

“Can’t sleep?

“That’s it.”

“Feel tired and cranky?”

“Yes, darn it!”

“Lasts forever?”

Stan, in his long white jacket, nods knowingly. He has already seen many, many cases like mine this morning. If only he were a doctor and not my butcher, I would feel better.  “It’s the same thing Bob has,” he pronounces. With no urine sample, no chest X-ray and ...


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