It's happened. With my daughter's third birthday looming in the very near future, I should have expected it, but in all honesty, I thought I had a little more time. I'm talking about the “Why” phase. Familiar with it? If not, it's pretty simple to grasp-your child asks a legitimate question (Where are we going?), you answer it (To the grocery store), and then they ask, “But why?”
Oh, at first you'll think it's harmless, and you'll give a detailed explanation as to why you are going to the grocery store (Because we ran out of food at our house), but it won't take long to see that this is not going to be a mature exchange. “But why?” We have to have food to eat. “But why?” If Mommy doesn't feed you regular, nutritious meals, the Department of Children's Services would be very upset. “But why?” Take some deep breaths, Mama.
This can turn the conversation to an undesired direction, and you have to be careful with the answers you give. Because not only do three year olds like asking “Why?”, but they also like repeating everything you say, word for word, to your preacher, their teacher, or your mother-in-law.
Even though the constant questions can be tiring, it's important to realize that there is an important purpose for them. These little human beings we are raising come to the planet with zero knowledge. We teach them everything from saying please and thank you to putting the toilet seat down (evidently, some parents don't teach this very well).
Some of the things we learn in life come naturally; when you pick up a bee and it stings you, you learn not to do that again. Other things in life come through instruction. “Don't go near the stove, and always treat it like it's hot!”
But some of the most valuable lessons we learn in life come from the questions we ask. It just so happens that the most probing questions tend to come from three year olds, and “Why?” tops the list. That simple word opens up worlds of knowledge for our children as we reluctantly explain every aspect of the universe within our understanding to them. It's not enough to just know what you should and should not do. We all want to know why, and children are no exception.
In fact, we could all stand to take a page from the three-year-old behavior book. Curiosity is contagious, and sometimes I think some adults are boring because they stop wondering “Why?” We become content and stop asking questions. We learn new things everyday, and it's only natural to have questions about the things we learn. I'm going to copy my daughter's fascination with the world and start asking “Why?” more often. Also, I'll be doing it to get back at her for the hours I've already spent, and the hours I will inevitably spend, answering that same question. Why? Good question.
Love, Mom
Debra (Fulcher) Carpenter writes when she isn't studying, or when she's procrastinating. Mostly when she's procrastinating. She is a young housewife, student, and mom.
Email her at interruptedmom@gmail.com or visit the website at www.motherinterrupted.com